Cheerio Guvnor My Ass
Comments:  2

The night before I departed for London I was a stressed out mess. The cause? Well, that stupid volcano in Iceland decided to spew forth its wrath over the entire isle of England. In a state of comedic agitation I would obsessively reload the BBC website in the hopes that I would see good news. But as each minute ticked by – one airport after the next was being closed. I felt like I was very slowly watching my vacation get flushed down the pooper. I went to bed not knowing what to expect next. While I was asleep, Heathrow airport shut its doors and no flights were allowed in or out.

Now generally speaking, a delayed flight isn’t such a bad thing. People reschedule all the time. So why the stressed out nonsense?

Well…lets explain how the first few days of my vacation were supposed to go:

Monday at 5:20am – Leave for London (connection made in Toronto)
Monday at 9:30pm – Arrive in London
Monday at 10:30pm – 12:30am – Have sex
Tuesday at 9:30am – Have sex
Tuesday at 10am – Eat Bacon
Tuesday at 12:30pm – Catch train to Brussels

Now if my flight was delayed for any reason – there was a good chance I would miss my train to Brussels. Another factor was that the person I was staying with would have to go to Brussels no matter what. With or without me. So quite literally if my plane did not get out on time – I was stranded. I would have no where to stay, I would have lost my non-refundable ticket to Brussels AND if I was delayed for more than 2 days I would have had to reschedule my entire trip completely because I HAD to be back by the end of the month to move.

But guess what kiddies….

After a sleepless night, I rolled over and tentatively checked the status of my flight. Everything was still a go. And even more important – Heathrow was open! It really was a WankerGirl miracle! The people at St. John’s airport warned me that things could still go tits up but the outlook was good. I just might make it to London! I remember smiling at a sea of Air Canada employees as they all gave me the thumbs up and wished me good luck.

By the time I actually arrived in London – I think I was still reeling from pre-flight stress. I honestly could not believe that it was happening. That I was once again back in London.

Fortunately, greeting me at the airport was a smirking man. I gave him a hug. He gave me a diet coke.

All other pre-scheduled activities went off without a hitch 🙂


2 Responses to “Cheerio Guvnor My Ass”
  1. HA! – great blog post. i love the end.


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