What I Did and What I Want
Comments:  8

What I Did

I Bought A PC

Over the summer of 2010 I dealt with the harsh realities of technology. More specifically – dead technology. Within a 30 day span I saw the death of my precious MacBook Pro AND my first ever MacBook. So in an act of desperation, I called up a good freind for moral support and I did something horrific. SHOCKING. I bought a PC. Those are words I thought I would never ever say. I’m officially a PC. A cheap PC that runs on Windows 7. I have never felt more like a whore.

I Saw Someone Else Be Me

Halloween parties are fun. People dress up, drink and eat too much candy. This year I innocently showed up to a party (as BatGirl!) and was amazed at what I saw. My awesome friend Erica actually dressed up as me! ME! She had the hair, shoes, dress and cleavage. She had everything. It took me a few seconds to realize what was happening – but I think the picture below sort of captures it all. My friends are awesome.

I Collected Tea Cups

I have this blurry memory of being 5 years old, sitting in my living room, collecting stamps. It feels so real and yet I know that I have never collected stamps. And for the longest time I never collected anything. But just recently I have discovered that I think I do collect something. I collect tea cups. Now its not a large collection. I have 3. Some might say that’s not a collection at all. But those people smell like donkey balls. And don’t get me started on their Daddy issues.

Hmmm…I am losing the point here.

The point is….I have three tea cups. They make me feel all lady like. So come over for tea! But bring cookies. And croissants. And tiny sandwiches with the crust cut off. A pork roast wouldn’t go astray either.

What I Want

Don Draper

To Write A Book

People have always told me that I should write a book. Of course this idea seems great but with perspective it also seems to be something that is completely and utterly unattainable. I guess what keeps me from diving into the task is that for me – writing is highly frustrating. The words don’t come easy and my spelling is somewhat shocking. Car wreck shocking. And then of course there is this fact that I really have no idea what I should write about. Well that’s a bit of a lie. I guess I should write about me. I am an expert on the topic. But doesn’t that just seem egotistical? Sigh. No wonder writers are tortured!

But yes. I want to write a book. It doesn’t have to be good. It just has to be over 150 pages long and contain the words “spatula” and “mangina”. Here I come Pulitzer!

Tattoo

I think its time to brand myself with my alter ego

Rubber Boots

The winter is coming and I don’t have a car . This means I will be spending many mornings and nights at a wet and cold bus stop. My life is glamorous. Anyway – after many years of wet feet I have decided to indulge. Indulge in rubber! (Kinky!) I want rubber boots. Expensive rubber boots. These boots will keep my feet warm and dry. They will go pleasantly with my chic winter fashions. But more importantly my rubber boots will caress me every morning and whisper “I Love You” just as I wake up. Yes rubber boot…I will marry you!

Comments

8 Responses to “What I Did and What I Want”
  1. Rainbow says:

    I love you haha. You’re a fabulous writer, very entertaining! Keep it up and I will see you at the party tonight!

  2. Zebulon says:

    Did someone call for expensive rubber boots? Have a gander at some Hunter wellingtons:
    http://www.countryfirstdirect.co.uk/brands.php?id=57

    Pricey, but surprisingly unsensible colours.I didn’t even know you could make rubber in fuchsia.

  3. Sharon says:

    I love reading your blogs and would love to read a book by you. I also love that tattoo. It seems I love a lot of things.

  4. CT Moore says:

    There’s a typos. This sentence:

    Halloween parties are fun. People dress up, drink and eat too much candy.

    Should read:

    Halloween parties are fun. People dress up, drink too much and eat too much candy.

  5. CT Moore says:

    Sorry for the double comment, but your blog machine didn’t accept my strikeout HTML on the second “too much” before the word “candy”. If it had, that comment would’ve been so much wittier.

  6. beavs says:

    i love that im on your blog…. does that make me internet famous? im sad nobody posted the bad “dana in the mirror” pictures i was trying to take.

  7. Rob Blatt says:

    Grab some Hunter Welington boots. I just got a pair yesterday and they are AWESOME.

  8. Jay Sharp says:

    Miss these blogs! Tattoo looks awesome just dont get it on your head =D
    Also a Wankergirl book would be epic!! The book, the legend, the comic…THE MOVIE!! You’d have to play your self of course with your friend Erica as stunt double.

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